Falling Away From Me
by AttractiveGravity
Summary: Kenny is left with only the memories of what happiness used to be. There is some language. K2 & others


**This is my first Fanfic ever, so bear with me here; I know it's far from perfect! Lol. But please R&R and let me know of anything I could do better in the future! Thank you! **

**The boys are supposed to be about 21 here, for reference. I felt like writing this after a song inspired this story! ("How Could You?" by Saliva—good song, be sure to check it out)**

…**And of course, South Park belongs to the very talented Matt & Trey!**

* * *

I, Kenny McCormick have been in a relationship with one of my best friends, Kyle Broflovski for the past 4 years. The relationship began great; I had finally given up my ways of indifference and polygamous relationships. Ah, fuck it; I was pretty much a whore before I fell for Kyle.

He had always seemed too perfect for me to have. Kyle was always so perfect, so kind and studious that he could never be interested in the broken Kenny McCormick. Though finally, after the last death I could remember, I decided I needed to tell him. I knew I was getting older and had died so many times, but I never knew which death would be my last, when I would never come back to this earth. I guess I've just spent one too many mornings waking up in someone else's bed, sneaking out before they awake to avoid the all-too-awkward confrontation after. The sex was great in the moment, but it only filled a small void, I needed something, someone more stable.

* * *

I vaguely remember the day I told Kyle, but I remember the way he looked at me. Those large emerald eyes looking right up at me, as he was sitting on the edge of his bed and I was standing, mainly because I was too nervous to sit. Hah, imagine me, Kenny McCormick, the one who could get anyone (and almost has) in South Park nervous! That's what Kyle does to me, and from then on I knew he was different. Those wonderful eyes glossed over as he fought back tears, he said, "Kenny, I love you too, but I just can't do it."

"Wha-why not?" I take a step back, startled by his reaction.

"I…I can't deal with someone who may leave me at the whim of one drunken night. I need something more permanent than that." At that, Kyle looks down at his hands, interlaced in his lap.

I instantly grab Kyle by the shoulders. He looks up at me and wipes a stray tear from his eye with the back of his hand. At this point I am willing to do anything to take the pain away. I know pain, probably more than anyone in this whole damn town, but it doesn't mean I want anyone else to feel it too.

"Kyle…" I speak softly, "I love you, I truly do. And I want to be with you, just you."

He sniffles and then says, "Promise, just you and I?"

"Promise", I reply as a grin makes its way across my face and I pull the redhead closer to my chest in a loving embrace.

* * *

But that was four years ago. I often reminisce on how close we used to be. Now he doesn't even seem like the same Kyle I fell in love with years ago, he's far more distant and looks at me as though I'm a stranger.

That's why I'm here, in our apartment pacing the floor. The lights are off and I didn't even bother to turn on the heat. The apartment is so cold that I can see my own breath as evidence. I reach in the front pocket of my orange parka and fumble to find the old pack of cigarettes I keep. Kyle hates it when I smoke, but right now I just don't give a fuck. He's not here anyway. I reach for my lighter and when I cannot find it, I remember putting it in the nightstand drawer. As I reach for the knob, I see the picture of Kyle and I at Stark's Pond two years ago. The radiant smiles plastered on our faces were far from fake. I sigh as I grab the lighter and close the drawer, wishing I could see that genuine smile again.

* * *

"Kyle, what's wrong dude?" The raven-haired male asks as he props himself up on his elbows on the bed.

"N-Nothing." Kyle replies as he grips his stomach with his arm. He can feel that pit in his stomach, that tinge of guilt that never fails to show up after a rendezvous with Stan.

"Ky…" Stan starts, placing his hands on Kyle's shoulders while kissing his neck lightly, "I know you feel bad for Kenny and I'm sorry I was such a pussy for not telling you how I felt earlier, but I need you Kyle. And it's obvious you need me too."

With that, Kyle turned his head around and met Stan's lips and pushed him forcefully back onto the bed. "If I'm going to continue doing this, it better be damn well worth it!" As Kyle once again meshed their lips together, tongues fighting for dominance, Stan hastily reaches over to his night stand once again.

* * *

After a few failed attempts, Kenny finally lights the cigarette he holds shakily between his two fingers. He continues to pace back and forth as he tries desperately to keep his mind occupied with something other than Kyle. He remembers his trip to the grocery store earlier in the day. It was pretty much the average trip-getting the groceries from the list that the way more organized Kyle makes each week-except this time he ran into someone. As he turned the corner down the aisle of alcohol, he saw a tall raven-haired male. He barely recognized him except for his signature red and blue poof ball hat.

"Stan!" Kenny cheerfully greeted his long lost friend.

"Oh hey Kenny, nice to see you!" Stan replied, still cheerful, but taken aback.

He remembered talking with Stan for a while, asking what was new in each other's lives since they hadn't seen each other in two years. He also noticed that Stan smelled of strong musk and cologne, unusually so, it was a distinct fragrance though. When they finally said goodbye and continued on their separate ways, Kenny caught a glimpse of a bottle of champagne and some lube in Stan's cart.

_That sly bastard has a hot date tonight!_ He thought to himself, _I wonder who the lucky chick is._

It was good to see Stan and see he was doing well, he wished he could say the same for himself.

* * *

"I really have to go now Stan," Kyle pleaded as he pulled his t-shirt over his head.

"I know, I know. I just wish you didn't have to." Stan said as he went to grab Kyle's jacket.

"Me too," Kyle replied as he gave Stan a peck goodbye, "see you soon."

"Alright." Stan slightly smiled as he shut the apartment door behind his love.

Stan walked over to the window of his third story apartment and watched as Kyle walked out into the snow, hands in his pockets trying to keep warm. Stan sighed as he knew Kyle was going back to Kenny and had to put on the charade that he loved him.

* * *

Kenny tried calling Kyle's cell phone again. Straight to voicemail.

"Hi this is Kyle, I can't come to the phone right now so leave a message and I'll get back to you." Kenny rolled his eyes as his boyfriend's cheery voice played out before him. It wasn't at all what he needed to hear.

The familiar sound of the door unlocking was faintly heard by Kenny as he continued to sit and stare at the unlit fireplace adjacent from him.

"Hey Ken, you couldn't imagine what type of day I had. So I went to the…"

Kenny couldn't hear anything; he was lost in his trance. But mostly, he didn't want to hear Kyle's excuses.

"Kenny?" Kyle then realized after babbling for a few minutes that Kenny hadn't moved at all. He knelt down in front of the chair that Kenny was sitting on and stared up at him with those emerald eyes that he loved. It was then that Kenny realized that they as well weren't the same. Those once warm and sparkling eyes were now cold and distant. Kenny snapped back to reality once his senses caught on to a familiar fragrance. Kyle had the scent of Stan.

All the fears Kenny had been suppressing for so long were now becoming all too real.

"I'm not alright okay!" Kenny snapped as he stood abruptly out of the chair, "I can't just stay here and pretend everything is fucking okay when I know what's going on!"

"Y-you do?" Kyle felt his throat closing as he struggled to get out those two words.

"Yes Kyle, don't let my redneck looks fool you, I'm not stupid." Kenny spat, "you love Stan."

Kenny finally said it; he knew it in his heart, but didn't want to believe it.

"I'm so sorry Kenny, I never meant for you to find out this way." Kyle said as he lightly touched Kenny's shoulder.

Kenny moved his shoulder and stepped back as soon as he felt the contact. "I think you'd better go." Kenny said coldly as he looked at the hardwood floor.

Kyle nodded and went to the bedroom he and Kenny used to share only to find that all his belongings had already been packed. He sighed as he grabbed his bags. He dragged his luggage down the hallway full of photographs and wonderful memories that he and Kenny had shared over the course of their relationship. As he stepped out the door, he looked back one last time at his previous lover and said, "Goodbye Ken, I wish you all the best, I truly do." Kyle thought he saw a half smile make its way across Kenny's face as he shut the door behind him.

Kyle felt bad for Kenny; he never meant to hurt him. Though, he was glad because he knew that now he could be with Stan legitimately. He smiled as he imagined the look on Stan's face when he would come to his apartment, belongings in tow. _Maybe one day Kenny would understand._ Kyle thought to himself as he loaded his bags in his car and headed off to the familiar drive to Stan's.

Kenny was surprised at how soon his sadness went away as he went to grab his keys to get something to eat. It was then that he felt his cell phone buzz in his pocket. He didn't even bother to look at who was calling.

"Hello."

"Is Kahl finally gone?" The voice on the other end said.

"Yep. Now get your fat ass over here." Kenny grinned as he snapped his phone shut and put his keys back on the counter; he had other plans.

* * *

_**So, Sorry if that sucked, but like I said, this is my first ever FF! I would love comments on what I could do better/what I can keep doing, etc. Thank You all! And thank you for reading!**_


End file.
